


Relieve My Mind

by Baamon5evr



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Bottom Sam Wilson, Dom/sub Undertones, M/M, Noise Kink, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn with Feelings, Rimming, Top Steve Rogers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-12
Updated: 2015-12-12
Packaged: 2018-05-06 06:56:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5407271
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Baamon5evr/pseuds/Baamon5evr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam's smile began to wane as he was struck with the intimacy of this moment between Steve and Bucky, the private nature of it. He realized the other Avengers had already vacated the room and he was the only jackass sticking around intruding. He was intruding. </p><p>Or Sam's kind of an idiot but he is also very human and Steve adores him anyway</p>
            </blockquote>





	Relieve My Mind

**Author's Note:**

> Come take control, just grab a hold  
> Of my body and mind, soon we'll be making it, honey  
> I'll be feeling fine,  
> You're my medicine, open up and let me in  
> Darling, you're so great, I can't wait for you to operate  
> When I get this feeling  
> I need sexual healing

Sam smiled a little to himself while watching Steve and Bucky embrace. He was happy for Steve. After spending weeks agonizing over whether Bucky was okay and if he would remember him or himself and if anyone would use him again Bucky had finally let himself be caught (because they didn't catch him despite what Sam's ego wanted to claim.) Sam had heard the pure joy in Steve's voice when he breathed out Bucky's name while the other man stood in the living room of the complex, had seen the happiness on Bucky's face as well and could see the tension that usually rolled off Steve in waves melt away as he ran to Bucky and pull him in for a hug.

"I missed you so much." Steve said, his voice thick with tears. He pulled back slightly and rested his forehead against his friend's.

"I missed you too, punk."

"Jerk." Steve laughed and went back to hugging Bucky. Sam's smile began to wane as he was struck with the intimacy of this moment, the private nature of it. He realized the other Avengers had already vacated the room and he was the only jackass sticking around intruding. He was _intruding_. He stepped back silently and slipped out of the room. He had always known that he and Steve wouldn't last. Whatever he had with Bucky was strong and all-encompassing and Sam wasn't about to compete with that. He had accepted this inevitability the first time he turned and saw the soft, lust-filled gaze Steve had on him but that didn't mean it didn't still hurt.

**~*~*~**

Sam began stirring as the dregs of sleep began to fade away. He hadn't been sleeping deeply, more so dozing and so he was alert quicker than he would have been otherwise. There was someone in his room, in his bed, with their arms wrapped around his waist, kissing his cheek. He jumped up, alarmed at who could slip past the complex's defenses and their AI, Jocasta's, detection.

"Whoa, whoa calm down Sam. It's me."

"Steve?" Sam's eyes adjusted to the darkness to see familiar broad shoulders sitting up across from him.

"Yeah, it's me."

"What are you doing here?" Sam couldn't see Steve's facial expression but did see him tilt his head to the side.

"Um, going to sleep. Unless you want to do something else, I don't mind." Sam felt the bed dip a little as Steve got closer to him and reached his hands out to his face. He pressed a kiss to Sam's cheek and then behind his ear.

"We can spend the rest of the night celebrating. We're finally able to end the great American road trip. Although, we can still go out and have fun hitting up souvenir shops and tourist traps, right?" Steve whispered in his ear. He sounded happy and normal, like nothing had changed, like nothing was different.

"I..." Sam trailed off hesitantly. Steve, always able to read him, pulled back and stared at him.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"I... I-I just thought you'd be with Bucky."

"I mean, we were talking so long I lost track of time but he said he was tired. We have loads more time, Bucky and I. I wanted to formally introduce you two but I turned around and you were gone."

"Well, you guys looked like you were having a private moment and I didn't want to interrupt." Steve tilted his head the other way but Sam still couldn't see his facial expression in the dark. He didn't really want to see the look on his face.

"Hmm." He didn't say anything, just stared at Sam until he was shifting uncomfortably.

"What? Why are staring at me?"

"Because something's obviously wrong and I'm waiting for you to tell me what it is yourself without us having to go through the whole runaround." Sam sighed. Steve seemed genuinely confused about what was wrong and now Sam felt dumb.

"It's stupid, Steve. Let's just, let's forget about it. Let's make each other forget." Sam said, set to pull Steve into a kiss.

"Now I know for sure something's wrong. You're being evasive and trying to distract me. Tell me what's wrong." Sam dropped his hands from Steve's face and looked down at the bed.

"I didn't expect you to come back." Sam confessed lowly.

"What? Why?"

"Because Bucky's back and I thought you'd be... the way you look when you talk about him, it's the same look you get when you talk about Peggy and I figured now that he's back you would be with him and not with... me anymore." The silence that followed was deafening and Sam wished he hadn't said anything.

"Is that what you really think of me? You think I could just drop you? That I could hurt you that way?"

"I... Bucky's important to you and--"

"And so are you. Sam, how could you think you're not? You're more important to me than I can even tell you. How can you think so little of yourself?"

"I don't, I just... I don't know."

"I think you do know. Something is wrong and I just want to make this better for you."

"I know you want to help, I know we're friends."

"I think we're a little more than friends, Sam." Steve said with a scoff.

"How would I know that? I mean, how would I know it was supposed to last? We didn't really talk about it or about the future--"

"Because every time I tried you would make an excuse and leave or turn the conversation towards Bucky or just nod without giving anything back so I stopped trying. I thought it freaked you out, talking about the future and commitment, thought you might think it was all old-fashioned." Looking back on it Sam realized Steve was right. He was the one who dodged the 'what are we' conversation because he was afraid of what Steve would say.

"I know you, Sam. I know you better than you probably think I do. This isn't really about Bucky, is it? It's about you and it's about me. So just tell me, please. What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong! That's it, don't you get it? Nothing is wrong and I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop because it has to. And maybe I decided to pin all that on your relationship with Bucky and it's not fair to you or to him. I know you better than that. I know you wouldn't just leave."

"But?"

"But I was kind of hoping you would because I would rather lose you that way than to have something happen to you."

"Sam..."

"I was in so deep with Riley. I was young and stupid and thought we were immortal and then he died and I wasn't... I wasn't enough to stop that. And you're harder to break but you can still break, you can still die and so I wanted us to be over before that. But I couldn't walk away, I wasn't strong enough to do that but I figured when Bucky came back you'd be so overwhelmed that you would leave and then it would be over. I know that it's stupid. I still would worry about you, I'd still... feel the way I do about you." Sam sighed and sat back against the headboard, putting a little distance between himself and Steve.

"I talk a pretty good game to my vets but I'm just as messed up." Steve didn't speak for a while and stayed so still that if Sam wasn't able to see his silhouette he'd think he had left and maybe he would once he said his piece. Maybe he'd be disappointed at Sam and his lack of faith in him and his stupid fears and decide to try his luck elsewhere. Instead, when he spoke, he said the last thing Sam expected.

"I'm so sorry, Sam."

"What?"

"I, God, I'm such an idiot."

"Huh?"

"I mean, of course chasing after Bucky probably brought up bad memories of Riley."

"No, well I mean yes but that's..."

"And Bucky was only ever my friend. I didn't mean to make you think I'd leave you."

"Steve, stop. Don't apologize to me, it's on me. I'm the one subconsciously trying to sabotage our relationship."

"Because you're afraid of this, of how you feel and I was too but you drove those fears away from me and I didn't do the same for you."

"Steve, stop blaming yourself. It's my shit."

"Maybe but that doesn't mean I can't do anything about it. You are... amazing. You are more than I deserve and I know that. You deal with shit I have no right to ask you to deal with but you still do and I am so lucky to have you, lucky to be in love with you. You hear me, Sam? I love you and I will spend a lifetime chasing those fears away for you if you need me to." Sam looked in the direction of Steve's body, he was looming closer to him and Sam was probably crying so it was best not to talk too much even though they still had things to discuss but Steve had just told him he loved him and damn it if he wasn't going to celebrate it.

"Kiss me." He stated with barely any inflection. It was not an order or a plea but was still filled with enough desperation that Steve didn't hesitate a moment before crawling over and pressing their lips firmly together. Sam wrapped his arms around Steve's neck and held him steady so he could kiss him to his heart's content. He knew he'd need to pull away before Steve would but he didn't want to even when his lungs began to burn at the lack of air. Steve pulled his lips from Sam's and began tracking them down his neck, kissing him and sucking randomly on his skin. Sam edged himself closer and Steve in response grabbed him around the waist and pulled him onto his lap. Sam gasped a little in surprise at the change of position.

"Jocasta, soundproof the room please." Steve said, pulling Sam in and pressing a slower but no less passion filled kiss to his lips.

"Planning on getting loud, Captain?"

"Well, I know how you can get and we're going to be a while."

"Is that a promise?"

"You bet your ass it is." Steve pulled him in again, running his hot hands over his arms and his chest and his thighs. Sam shivered at his hands but wanted him to touch bare skin so he pulled away slightly and pulled his shirt off, throwing it across the room. Steve immediately began pressing kisses to his chest and running his thumbs over his nipples. He leaned down and began licking and sucking Sam's right nipple before he lavished the other one with just as much attention. Sam threw his head back letting Steve do what he wanted, Nipple play got Steve off more than him but he still enjoyed it well enough. He could feel Steve's erection pressing against his ass through their sweats and began grinding down against him, drawing a throaty moan from the larger man. Steve moved quickly, changing their position again. He laid Sam under him and pulled off his shirt before laying his body astride Sam's, pressing their groins together and continuing to grind against him. Sam bit back a groan he knew would be embarrassingly loud and pulled Steve into another kiss to swallow it but Steve pulled away after not too long.

"Don't hold back, no one can hear. It's just you and me." Sam deliberately bit his lip to keep from making too much noise. Steve grabbed his chin and pulled his lips apart before he began sucking on Sam's bottom lip. Sam was breathing harshly as Steve continued grinding before yelping in surprise as Steve's hand suddenly found itself inside of his pants, squeezing his dick with just enough pressure for Sam to feel it and yearn for more.

"I want to hear you."

"Well, then you're going to have to do something about that. I don't have a whole lot of reason to be screaming right now." Sam retorted in an even voice, even though his insides felt ready to melt and he could get off just from Steve sliding his body against his. However, Sam wasn't about to let Steve know that and deal with his ego tomorrow. Steve looked at him with a quirked eyebrow.

"Is that a challenge?"

"What does it sound like?" Steve smirked at him slowly before setting upon him. He undressed him and it wasn't unlike being caught up in the strong winds of a storm and before Sam really had a chance to say anything he found himself naked under Steve.

"So you proved you could make a killing working as a quick change attendant. What now?" Sam said, knowing full well he was only making this worse for himself.

"You don't have to go anywhere tomorrow, right?" Steve questioned but didn't wait for an answer before he began spreading kisses down Sam's chest. Sam watched Steve get lower and lower, waiting for his mouth to take Sam's length but instead he skipped his groin completely and began kissing his legs. Sam rolled his eyes but didn't comment on the tease. Eventually Steve found his way back to Sam's groin but contented himself kissing and sucking at his thighs instead of sucking him off like Sam wanted.

"Steve..." He hissed.

"Yes?" Steve asked innocently.

"Stop teasing me."

"I'm not teasing you; I'm just paying special attention to every part of you."

"Don't play with me."

"If you want something from me, you only have to tell me."

"You know what I want."

"Do I? Reading minds is Wanda's trick, not mine. Afraid you're going to have to be specific."

"Are you going to blow me or not?" Sam asked, getting frustrated. Steve's hot breath was blowing right on his head and it was driving him crazy.

"I will get to that yes but seeing as how you didn't tell me what you want I'll just have to do my best to figure it out on my own." Sam was half curious and half afraid of what exactly that meant but couldn't stop his breath from hitching harshly in his throat as he watched Steve begin sucking on one of his fingers. He could feel his asshole trembling and his cock twitching at just the sight of those fingers disappearing past his lips. Sam watched him pull his glistening fingers from his mouth before lowering them agonizingly slow to Sam's ass. He shivered when Steve ran them over his entrance, massaging the muscles but not making a move to push past that point.

"Steve, please just do it."

"Tell me what you want."

"I want to feel you."

"How? Tell me."

"I want you to fuck me with your fingers, alright! Is that what you want to hear?"

"Yes, that's exactly what I was waiting for." Sam could hear the smirk in Steve's voice without even seeing his face.

"You are an asshole." Sam gritted out with annoyance in his voice even though his annoyance didn't run any deeper than it did all the other times Steve was teasing him in bed.

"No, this is an asshole." He retorted, punctuating his sentence by licking a long stroke over Sam's hole. He gasped at the unexpected feel of it, of having Steve's tongue there. They had done a lot of things but not this.

"Steve?" Sam looked down at Steve and he was looking up at him wide-eyed and earnest.

"Trust me. I've got you." Sam breathed deeply, not quite sure where this exact fear of letting Steve do this came from. He wasn't exactly modest when it came to the bedroom but something about this particular action seemed more intimate than he thought it would.

"Can I?" Steve asked, obviously sensing Sam's internal battle. Sam thought it over before nodding his head. Steve seemed quite eager to do this and if he wanted to, well, Sam didn't really mind letting him. Steve kept his gaze locked on him as he lowered his mouth between Sam's cheeks and licked a long stroke once more. Sam couldn't help the shiver that left him as he watched Steve close his eyes in clear pleasure. Steve's tongue eventually localized on his hole and Sam could feel him pressing kisses and sucking at the ring of muscles between stripes of wet heat. Sam leaned back against his pillow as the sensation of Steve's mouth started cause his dick to pulsate almost painfully with need. Sam couldn't stop the embarrassingly high pitched whimper that left him when Steve's tongue pushed into him. Thankfully Steve couldn't say anything as his mouth was too full. He swirled his tongue around inside of him while simultaneously sucking at him. Sam's leg started to tremble as he worked to hold in any further noises, not wanting to give in easily. Steve liked working for it and Sam reaped the benefits of it. Steve deliberately groaned lowly, the sound vibrating through Sam's body.

 _Cheating asshole._ Sam thought to himself with no real venom at all.

Eventually Sam felt Steve's finger join his tongue, he waited with anticipation to feel his finger enter him but instead he just circled his finger around Sam's ass before he began ghosting it up and down his length. Sam couldn't hold back the whine at Steve's tease. He wasn't really giving him much of what he needed. He reached down himself, intent on jerking off but Steve smacked his hand away without even looking. Sam groaned loudly in frustration and felt Steve grin against his ass.

"That doesn't count. That wasn't pleasure, that was-- fuck!" Sam exclaimed, unable to control his mouth momentarily as Steve switched gears fast as lightening. Suddenly his mouth was on Sam's dick and one of his hands was massaging Sam's balls. He bit his lip hard enough to draw blood as he tried to ward off the sounds that wanted nothing more than to rip out of his throat. Steve was relentless. He sucked Sam's length hard; hollowing his cheeks as he unabashedly bobbed his head up and down. He pulled up so it was just the head of his dick still in his mouth and began to suck at the sensitive appendage.

Sam slapped a hand over his mouth to lessen the volume of the noises coming out. Steve dipped his head low on him, taking all of him into his mouth and began swallowing around him as his thumb rubbed circles into his balls. His other hand moved back to Sam's entrance and started stroking over his hole. If Steve let his fingers slip inside of him that would be it, Sam wouldn't be able to stop screaming once he started.

Just as he thought that one of Steve's fingers pushed inside of him. His whole body jerked at the feel and Sam quickly grabbed the pillow beside him and pressed it onto his face to muffle the noises he was sure to start making soon enough. Steve grabbed the pillow and threw it across the room. Sam groaned and stuffed his fist into his mouth, trying to stay quiet. Steve began circling his thumb with a firmer touch on his balls and sucked him off in earnest as his fingers, now two went deep inside of him and began brushing against his prostate. Sam groaned loudly around his fist. He couldn't hold it in anymore, couldn't hold back, not when Steve was overwhelming him this way. He dropped his hand to the sheets and bunched them up tightly letting all the moans and purrs and screams and sighs Steve longed to hear fall past his lips. Steve hummed with satisfaction around him, the noise shooting through Sam's dick into his belly. It felt so good, having Steve like this and he could get off like this easily but he wanted and needed more. He nudged at Steve's shoulder gently with his foot prompting the larger man to let his penis fall from his lips with an obscene pop.

"What's wrong?"

"I want everything you have to give me." Steve searched his face for a long before nodding. He didn't force him to elaborate on what he meant; instead he removed his hands and crawled up the bed towards the side dresser where the lubricant and condoms were. He switched their positions so Steve was on the bottom. He shuffled his way down the bed to Steve's waist and quickly divested him of his pants and underwear throwing them behind him. Steve's dick was erect and dripping precum, just from his actions on Sam. He was suddenly overcome with want and leaned forward without a second thought, closing his mouth around Steve's dick.

"Oh shit." Sam would've smiled at his reaction if he could. He sunk his mouth down onto Steve's hard length, soaking in the taste of Steve, the smell of him, the feel of him surrounding him, enveloping him and nearly overwhelming him completely. He began sucking exclusively on the head of his dick, revenge for his stunt earlier.

"Ugh, Sam if you keep doing that I'm going to come." Sam pulled off of his head gently.

"You'll be hard again a minute later, I'll bring you back." Sam responded, licking along the vein on his length. Steve shuddered under him but didn't come and Sam didn't stop. He sunk his mouth back down and began bobbing his head and sucking intermittently, his hand stroking what his mouth couldn't. Steve was squirming underneath him, gripping the sheets and saying his name over and over again. He could tell the exact moment Steve was going to come, as the pitch of his voice became higher and his body tensed harshly like it always did before relaxing completely. Sam swallowed thickly, licking Steve clean before he teasingly sucked at the head of his dick, knowing it would take Steve three more go arounds before it started to hurt but he would still be sensitive.

"Sam, you're going to kill me." Sam sucked harder, enjoying Steve's prolonged groan before giving him a break and crawling up his body instead to press a kiss to his lips.

"Stop whining. You gave it to me a lot worse than I did." Steve flipped him over and kissed him hard, pressing him into the mattress. Sam pulled back and looked down where Steve was... yup, he was hard again.

"Are you serious?"

"You said yourself it'd happen again soon."

"I know but I didn't mean an actual minute."

"Less than a minute really. What? You can't keep up." Sam rose an eyebrow and reached down but Steve grabbed his hand and pinned it down to the bed. Sam looked up at Steve, a challenge in his eyes.

"What? What do you wanna do?" Sam asked him, his voice husky and lower than normal.

"I can think of a few things I wanna do. What do you want me to do?" Sam pulled him down into a slow kiss that was no less heated than any other kiss they'd shared that night.

"I want you to fuck me. Is that what you want?" Steve nodded his head against his. He opened the cap of the lube in his hand and squeezed some out before he went about slicking Sam's opening up even further. He was fairly prepared and took two of Steve's fingers no problem. It took a bit more stretching to get to three and Sam laid back and enjoyed Steve's fingers working him open. Steve pulled out after a few moments and quickly rolled the condom onto himself before slicking some lubricant onto his member as well. He leaned down and pressed a kiss once more to Sam's lips as he began sinking into him slowly. Sam's breath hitched as he entered him but he didn't break the kiss, instead focusing his attentions on Steve's lips until the feeling of him filling him up more and more began to overwhelm him with sensation. He breathed heavily against Steve's lips as he bottomed out, reveling in the stretch of his dick inside of him.

"Okay?" Steve asked. Sam nodded his head in affirmation and Steve wasted no time pulling out and thrusting back in. Sam tried to wrap his arms around Steve's neck but the blonde kept his arms pressed to the bed as he continued his thrusts, thrusting even deeper. Sam groaned and didn't fight Steve's hold, resolving to let him control the situation. He threaded his fingers through Sam's and continued his thrusts as if he were on a mission. Sam's noises picked up again. Noises that were almost embarrassing, almost. He was suddenly very glad the room was soundproofed when a particularly loud moan ripped through him.

"Uhn, Steve. Faster please. Please, fuck me, fuck me, fuck me."

"Thought that was what I was doing." Steve said through grunts. Sam rolled his eyes but responded to his snarkiness even though it would be pointless.

"Really? I couldn't tell." Steve gave him a particularly hard thrust and hit him right it counted.

"Could you tell then?"

"Oh yeah, I could tell." Steve continued his thrusts harder, aiming for that particular spot. With each thrust inward Sam moaned deeply at the contact. He could feel a storm roiling in his stomach, growing stronger with each well placed thrust. He could see himself coming with no help needed. Sam leaned up as much as he could despite Steve's hands holding him down, trying his best to kiss him. Steve leaned down and allowed it but there was a new angle to his thrusts now that left Sam burning up and wanting more.

"I want to be on top. Let me move. Let me ride you." Steve looked down at him with heavy eyes before deftly changing their positions so Sam was sitting on his lap. He pressed his hands into Steve's considerable chest for leverage before he let his hips rise and fall over Steve's shaft. He felt his chest constricting at the new angle Steve's dick was hitting him inside. Steve's hands ran down his back to his ass as he sat up and began kissing Sam's neck while grinding up into him.

"Ah, ah, ah fuck." Sam moaned.

"Sam..." Steve said breathlessly.

"I need to, oh god, I need..." Steve nodded against his neck before Sam felt his hand begin stroking his dick leisurely. Sam rode Steve harder, his breath hitching more and more until he felt himself tense up and his body jerked violently as he finally hit his release. He kept going even though his muscles were twitching and random spasms kept racking through him.

"Steve, you have to... I don't think I can..." Steve, as always, understood what he meant. He flipped them once again so Sam was on the bottom and thrusted forward. Sam wrapped one of his arms around Steve's neck, grabbed a handful of his hair in his other hand and held on, letting Steve chase his release. He pressed his face into Sam's neck, until finally he tensed once more before relaxing above him. He held most of his body weight off of Sam by holding himself up on his elbows. Sam smirked a little when Steve looked down at him, his pupils blown, his hair a mess, red blotches all over his face and chest.

"You look sufficiently satisfied." Sam said, feeling a little smug. He could afford it.

"Oh, I'm not done with you. Not by a long shot. We've still got the rest of the night." Steve got that hungry look he got when he planned on spending the night decidedly not sleeping. That look always half terrified and half excited Sam. Oh well, he didn't have work for another three days so he could afford not walking right for the next few days. It would be worth all the jokes Natasha and Rhodey were sure to make. He and Steve stilled had a ton of things to discuss but for now Sam was just fine with letting Steve's libido win.

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from "Sexual Healing" by Marvin Gaye.


End file.
